So some people might be like "what's the big deal?" but anyway ....
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This is the
5th day that I have not had a drink
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Since roughly March 2003 I have (with the exception of 5 months back when I started this blog as
dryfreelean.blogspot.com) been drinking pretty much every night. Oh and
by the way don't go there, spammers picked up that URL after I deleted my original blog and it will take you to one add site after another without you having to even touch your keyboard.
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But I digress, anyway .. coming home, having a friend or two over (although not always) and pouring a great big
Screwdriver became a way of life for me. It was something I looked forward to. I would have three before the night was over. It "took the edge" off the day. Yea right ...
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I will mention that this is the longest I've gone since the 5 months mentioned above. It's a good sign, for two reasons. The first being, well it's been the longest as I said and the second reason is that I have a new perspective on kicking this messy habit. In the past, to stop drinking, I would replace the alcohol with something else. The most effective substitution has always been working out. Running, crunching, lifting, eating incredibly healthy foods (I naturally refrain from fast food and high sodium content meals so I suppose that isn't such a big deal). What I have learned recently from talking online to others is that you must first abstain and live your life normally as you had before, just
sans the hooch.
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Why is that you ask?
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Because ... if you do replace "drinking time" with some other activity and for some reason (an injury for example) you cannot continue on with the replacement activity, you almost certainly will view it subconsciously as a
failure and start drinking again. It's just that simple. This is advice coming from people who have been sober for (in some cases) 20 years or more. People who tried to kick this nasty addiction repeatedly over the years before they got in touch with what it takes to stay clean.
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I realize that everyone is an individual. The same method is certainly not going to work for the masses. However this time, I'm really feeling something substantially different. I have not changed a thing in my daily routine and it feels amazing. Sort of like I am back in the days when I didn't drink at all (pre-27 my marriage years). I look better, feel better and yea I know it's been less than a week but something is just different this time.
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moving right along ..
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This will be the
last night of 2nd shift. This morning I ran over to the main office, put $20. on my laundry card and started bagging up (yea ok I'm an uber slob) my laundry. It's um *cough* been a while. Thank god I have enough clothes for 6 people or else I'd be in real trouble. I still have tons more (although most of what is clean is not on my
ropas favoritas list) but am sick of having to spend 20 minutes figuring out what to wear each day because I don't like what's still clean. I did find a yellow shirt and a pair of gray boxer briefs that were hidden in a drawer however and it is with them that I present:
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Happy HNT!!
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S5 156
HHNT!
As for laundry, I did that last night. I hate doing laundry, but I lovelovelove folding it when it's fresh from the dryer.
mmm ... warm laundry. so nice.
HHNT!
As for laundry HNT, ... [drool...] - and where do we cast our vote again for our VERY favorite Persian?
Which leads me to my final comment for the post... as a self-proclaimed "flag nut" (vexillologist), I not only drooled over HNT but over your new avatar!!
Anyway, I agree with you to a point in terms of not replacing the addiction with another addiction. Of course replacing an addiction with a new healthy habit, well that's not the same thing. But I will say , in AA, we say it's not the "alcohol", but the "ism", that is the core issue. Meaning that there is a spritual and mental malady that needs to be addressed additionally. Getting off alcohol just being the first, but necessary , step in that process.In other words alcohol addiction is merely a symptom of a larger issue(s). I think you "get" that part of it.
I have a lot of respect for you and what you are doing. Keep it up!