Sunday, January 20, 2008
ok so...
I've been away for a bit, after Gram passed I have been kind of in a funk, and it started really sinking in, she's gone forever. It seem like one thing after another.
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I am pretty much ok
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My sons actually keep me feeling alive and focused
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I know that sounds corny but they always have. Just spending time with them makes me forget anything that is bothering me.. Anything. I helped give them life, they help keep me sane, what a trade off.
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moving right along...
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we saw Cloverfield today
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about a year ago I saw the preview in the theatre, at that point the film had not been officially named. I knew then it was something I just had to see... and oh SHIT was I spot on!!
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Incredible!!
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If you can get past the shaky camera (the whole movie is filmed with an ever-moving hand held digital camera) you will leave the theatre stunned. It really was even better than I expected it to be (and trust me I expected it to be amazing)
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so my younger son always notices this picture on my fridge..
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Yea I admit it I really like Zachary Quinto (Sylar from Heroes)
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I also kinda like this video someone made on Youtube...
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My kids HATE Justin, but I don't so much...
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:)
Sunday, January 06, 2008
Gram..
Her last birthday with us....
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she so loved Chocolate
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today...

My Aunt and I met at the funeral home to make the arrangements. It was a long very tedious process selecting everything from the prayer cards to the casket. I then picked up my sons and we headed out to buy suits. Luckily we found a place where they can be (alterations) ready for tomorrow, as the wake is Tuesday night. This will be the first funeral of a loved one for my younger son, while his older brother has already been to a few.
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The impact of Gram's death upon my kids is minimal, as would be expected since they never really knew the Gram of my youth and early adulthood. The woman who I bonded with ever so much as a 15 year old losing his dad, who was her only son. As I said we are a very small family. Gram was a very private person, who did not wear her emotions on her sleeve. When she hit her mid Seventies she began to decline as a result of slowly progressive dementia. They knew her during this time.
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She adored them, and even to the very end had no trouble recognizing their faces (which says heaps) and would to spout out a story about their earliest days. There were few she remembered toward the end, and to me this is a clear indication as to just how important her two great-grandsons were to her.
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I need sleep....
Saturday, January 05, 2008
rough night...

Gram passed away tonight... I held her hand for 6 hours right until the end.
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She isn't suffering anymore
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I like to remember her like this... from just a few months ago
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things are crazy right now
Thursday, January 03, 2008
update...
I really meant to keep going daily here, but things have been popping up and I am still feeling miserably deafish.
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I went to The Doctor on Wednesday, two hours later they removed a wax ball (gross I know, sorry) the size of a dime. The Nurse gasped, exclaimed "Ohhhh my GOD!" plucked it out and made me look (ew), and then said she had never seen anything like it (and given her advanced age that meant heaps). Sadly I still can't hear out of that ear, they said I have more wax to remove. I've got to continue using the drops until Monday when they are going to try all over again.
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ugh...
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Work has been insane... Month, Quarter and Year End, yuk.
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Tonight I learned my Gram is getting worse, possibly even had a stroke tonight (we will find out after test results are in tomorrow). We are a very small family (essentially Gram, me, my two sons and my Spinster Aunt, my father (her son) passed away when I was 15). I am going to go up and see her tomorrow after work. Her mind has been steadily failing for the past few years, but her body has always been in fantastic shape. She's in her early 80's and could run circles around most 55-60 year olds. It comes from a lifetime of pampering and healthy living.
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I'm really worried..
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Anyway... things have been hectic, and continue to get even more hectic.
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I have to catch up on all my friend's blogs but it's like one thing after another lately...